Week 9

Charlotte is 9 weeks old today.  She seems to be demanding more play time which is fun/exhausting.  Her vision must be getting better and she sure does not want to miss anything!  She should enjoy it while it is good - if her parents are any indicator myopia should set in in just a few short years!  We have discovered the joys of the sleep sack - 4 nights this week she slept from 8PM till 6:30 in the morning.  I say this as she got up at 4:30 and 7:30 this particular morning.  I am not so well rested - I am fighting a cold (oh dear body, can anything go right with you?) and the antihistimines I have been given are just sleep in a pill.  A very tiny yellow pill filled with infinite sleep.

I went to the doctor this morning and I do not have very serious rheumatoid arthritis which is good - it should relieve itself (and hopefully not be chronic) within a short time (e.g. months).  I will be giving up breastfeeding, as I find it difficult to care for baby without all my limbs agreeing with me.  At the moment I am pumping less to a gradual nil.

I also went to a psychologist this week to see if I had postpartum depression (my goodness mental healthcare is CHEAP in Singapore!  I think I paid about $60 US for the consultation - which is cheaper than the US!  In Hong Kong and Macau is was $200 US for an hour with an MSW (not even a doctor) and $250 US for a PhD in psychology).  I took a diagnostic test (I love the idea of quantifying one's own depression) and I am not depressed, just having some adjustment issues (e.g. the breastfeeding, carpal tunnel, rheumatoid arthritis causing me to not be able to handle the baby as well as I would like, among other things I won't mention here).  As always it is good to talk to someone just so you don't feel so alone, as motherhood can be (dare I say the obvious) isolating.  I just don't know how one can not feel overwhelmed by motherhood - it is such a change but I guess the payoff is worth it.  I like to manage projects and Charlotte is a 20 year project.

I may join a mother's support group, though I am not so stellar at these group participation things as I tend to clam up and be judgmental and contribute nothing (which, I am sure, stems from my fear of failure).  I am really grateful to the help that we have here, particularly Imee who is really good with Charlotte and helps me as I pump or take a nap to get myself better from my various ailments. 

On yet another lighter note, here are some requisite pictures of Charlotte.  She looks more and more like Buddha everyday! :)

Cheeky:


Angsty:


Debonaire:


In Buddha-like togs:


"Whatcha talkin' 'bout Willis?"


Laughing Buddha!